"Blowing out someone else’s candle won’t make yours shine brighter"
there is a difference between people who are smart and people who get good grades
(Source: hoodpapa, via guy)
#diaries of an outsider
I feel guilty for not liking my mother.
I mean, she gave birth to me, my sisters and my brother.
By default, there should always be a mutual understanding
an immediate friendship.
But she’s always determined to test it.
I realized that the attachment of an umbilical cord
does not automatically signify the attachment of a bond.
And to say it out loud, it feels wrong.
But how many times is she going to push me
towards the cliff side where I wonder;
What would death’s embrace feel like?
Every insult and strike
It’s not pleasant
Its not right.
But I’m silent and quiet.
And if I say a word
her anger is stirred.
Because a daughter isn’t meant to feel.
A daughter isn’t meant to be heard
Or talk back.
Or have opinions on a different track
that are not fed to me as my own are thrown.
My dreams, my hopes, my goals.
Ripped to pieces and tattered.
But I wont say she hasn’t taught me a thing.
Like how the world doesn’t care about me.
Won’t give a damn.
How my voice is as small as a grain of sand
How my mind is shit
and everything that comes out of my mouth is lacking wit.
She has taught me that I am beneath the rest.
And my hard working best
is compared to dirt.
And I realize I am an adult
but her words cut deep, and maybe that was her desired result.
I love my mother, but I just don’t like her.
Because a woman isn’t a mother
Until she learns to give to others.
And giving life isn’t the last step,
it’s the first.
So excuse me if I’m being rude,
but I’m finally speaking out: